Getting Back to Normal, Slowly

First, thank you for the comments on my frustration at j for his lack of obedience. While I believe that j always desires to please me, I also know that he is lazy and gets preoccupied easily. After much discussion with j about neglecting his responsibilities, it seems he decided that the priority was to clean the house rather than my list of tasks I require of him. Of course, this is not his decision to make, and in my mind is akin to topping from the bottom. j has a hard time understanding the significance of some of my requests, and I think that since he does not view them as important, he ignores them.

This whole thing puts me in a predicament. I often feel like a nagging bitch because I have to remind him (several times sometimes) to do the things I ask of him. On the other hand, if I say nothing, I get resentful and angry, and I hate being that way. In my opinion, a submissive man should be regularly looking for ways to please his Mistress. he should strive to come up with new and different ways to make her happy or make her life easier. And above all else, he should do what is asked of him, when it is asked of him.

I believe physical punishments are in order, as well as a training program. Frankly, the D/s part of our marriage was initiated by him, but once I learned more about it I dove in full force. It probably has always been a part of who I am, just one that I neglected for a while. I am not willing to go back to vanilla and deny myself who I am. If, however, j continues to be disobedient and ignore my requests, I am considering looking for another submissive who can meet my needs.